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Why Your Relationships Fail

As a student of human behavior, I find this interesting.

Do your relationships always fail? Do you have trouble sustaining a relationship no matter how much you like him or her? There could be something going on behind the scenes that is keeping you from relationship happiness. Here are 8 reasons why your relationships always fail:

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(Source: psych-quotes, via psych-quotes)

The Signs and Commitment

• Aries: These people are big flirts when they’re single, but once they find that special someone, they’re committed to that person and that person only. If you’re looking to keep them around, keep the relationship fun and exciting. Don’t develop too many routines. 
   
• Taurus: A Taurus is nothing but dedicated. They are sometimes a little too dedicated to someone. They look for a close, honest, and loyal relationship. But because they are so committed to you, they expect you to return the loyalty!
   
• Gemini: A Gemini won’t always cheat on you if they lose interest but they will flirt with others. Even if they’re head over heels for you, you still may find them checking out the hot man/woman on the other side of the room in that tight outfit. But don’t worry! They may have their fantasies, but they’re coming home to you at the end of the night.
   
• Cancer: This sign takes every relationship very seriously and will think twice before ever cheating on you! They always consider your feelings and how you’d react if you ever found out.
   
• Leo: A Leo has a hard time keeping a very long relationship. They’re constantly changing and growing and their attitudes toward relationships change. Sometimes they want to settle down and other times they don’t. 
   
• Virgo: A Virgo is more in love with him/herself than they ever will be with someone else. Sometimes they don’t consider others’ feelings and will act without thinking. They need someone to open their eyes and calm them down. They need someone to show them how to be serious and faithful. 
   
• Libra: Libras’ opinions about someone (especially their mate) are always changing. They love you, then they want to leave you, then they want to be with you, and then they’re ready to be with someone else. Usually they end up staying with someone for a while but they struggle with flirting with others. They’re big flirts!
   
• Scorpio: A Scorpio is usually very loyal but also insecure. Because of this trait, they make any relationship difficult. If it becomes difficult, they won’t always leave. They’ll stick around but may find someone new. However, this isn’t true for every Scorpio. 
   
• Sagittarius: These people never know what they want. They need someone who can keep up with them, for they’re always on the run. As much as they’d like to have a long and serious relationship, they can’t always stick around and commit to just one person.
   
• Capricorn: If you read the “Cancer” section above, it’s the exact same for the Capricorn. Tradition, commitment, and seriousness = a Cap.
   
• Aquarius: This may be the most unreliable sign when it comes to relationships. Though these people are sweet, they’re also very confusing and indecisive. They can’t decide if they want to be with someone or leave them.
   
• Pisces: A Pisces always feels lucky to have any partner they can get a hold of, so they won’t let you go without a fight. They’re cautious in any relationship and very committed. They’re looking for one person and one person only. 

(Source: allzodiac, via psych-quotes)

10 Signs Someone is Interested in You

1. They stand closer to you or they keep a smaller distance when they’re around you. It shows that they are comfortable with you and want to get physically intimate. 

2. They are more likely to face you when talking to you as opposed to standing sideways or away from you. However, if they are shy, then maybe this point won’t apply so much. Instead, they will periodically take glimpses at you when you’re not looking. 

3. They’d try to get your attention for trivial things such as calling you about what homework they have or when the homework is due. 

4. They smile more frequently because of you. Even if they don’t show it while around you because they don’t want you to find out they like you, they will smile when they think of you. 

5. Their behavior can be passive aggressive. They may appear to show interest in you one day and not the other. Sometimes, this leaves you wondering if you pissed them off without realizing. When someone likes you, little things you do can hurt them, because they have taken a bigger notice to you.

6. They prioritize their activities with you. They may cancel plans just so they can meet up with you or assist you with something. 

7. Their friends know about you. They have probably at some point confess to at least one friend their feelings about you.  

8. They want to find out more about you to see if you’re single or available or/and if you’re compatible. 

9. They will care about you if you are upset and they will often try to do something for you. Remember, people may not always tell you how they feel, but they will always show you. You just have to pay attention. 

10. Last but not least, the most obvious sign is that they will feel upset or hurt if they learn that you don’t like them or when they get rejected by you. 

The more of these signs someone shows towards you, the higher the chance they are interested in you. However, 1 or 2 of these signs alone may mean nothing at all. Furthermore, each person is different and this may not apply to all types of personalities, but this does relate to most. You can add more tell-tale signs below. 

(Source: psych-quotes, via psych-quotes)

The Secrets to a Better Relationship

onlinecounsellingcollege:

1. Make sure you spend time alone together.

2. Appreciate each other, and express your gratitude. Don’t take them for granted – or you may regret it later!

3. Major on communicating openly and honestly (share and talk about everything).

4. Don’t allow small offenses and minor irritations to morph into huge resentments.

5. Work through, and get a handle on any feelings of jealousy.

6. Allow your partner to be a flawed human being. Don’t expect them to be perfect, or to please you all the time.

7. Show affection, and demonstrate you care.

Father-Daughter Relationships

onlinecounsellingcollege:

Research indicates there are six types of unhealthy father-daughter relationships. They include:

1.      The Lost Father: These are dads who may still live with their daughters but they abandon them emotionally. They basically ignore them, don’t praise their achievements, or comment on their successes and accomplishments. As a consequence, these daughters have low self esteem and lack confidence in their abilities. They feel completely starved of love and look to other guys to give them the attention and affection they crave and need.

2.      The Abusive Father: These are dads who communicate the message “my needs are all that matter – and yours don’t count at all.” Their moods and behaviors are unpredictable, unstable and destructive. They are quick to erupt in anger, are emotionally and verbally abusive, and may be physically or sexually abusive, too. Because these dads are dominant and controlling, their daughters grow up with no real identity. They are fearful or having and expressing an opinion, and prefer not to be noticed. They often expect to be misused by others, fear relationships and have low self esteem.

3.      The Pampering Father: These dads treat their daughters like little princesses who are pampered and spoiled from the day that they are born. Thus, they grow up with a sense of entitlement and they see themselves as special, and more deserving than others. This can lead to problems in all relationships as they are self absorbed and manipulative.

4.      The Toxic Father: These fathers teach their daughters that women are “one down” so she needs his help to make it in life. This makes it hard for the daughter to launch out on her own, and live a successful, independent life.

5.      The Ruined Father: These dads are broken men who need the support and constant attention of their daughter to survive. For example, they may be unemployed or have clinical depression – so they lean on their daughter “to try and make it through”. This leads to an inappropriate dependency that prevents the daughter from living her own life. It can lead to bitterness and anger in the end.

6.      The Anguished Father: This type of father-daughter relationship is slightly different to the other five types. Here, the daughter reacts to perceived faults, failings or indifference in her father  and acts out her anger through rebellious behaviour , anorexia, or  lifestyle choices that distress her dad. However, she’s not really free as her choices are reactions  and ways of expressing how she feels about her dad.

(via psych-facts)

4 Types of Unhealthy Mother-Daughter Relationship

onlinecounsellingcollege:

1. Bosom Buddies: This is where the mother wants to be her daughter’s best friend. The relationship is usually warm and close, and the mother prides herself on always being there to emotionally support and advise her daughter. Communication is open, honest and real – which can start to feel threatening as the daughter gets older and wants to erect appropriate boundaries. In this type of mother-daughter bond, the mothers lives vicariously through her daughter and find it hard to discipline appropriately (as she’s too enmeshed with her daughter’s life).

2. Boss and Subordinate: This is where the mother wants to dominate and control every aspect of her daughter’s life. She’s always giving her opinion, making demands, and requiring her daughter to follow her rules, or live up to the expectations she has set. She’s also rigid, harsh and may lack empathy. Although the daughter may comply in her younger years, she is quietly resentful and will likely rebel – either strongly and loudly, or in a more passive way. She may feel she must be “perfect”, have low self-esteem and fear rejection and judgement by others.

3. Rivals: This is where the mother sees her daughter as a rival or threat so she’s always in competition with her. Thus, instead of seeing each other as completely separate people, and allowing each other to simply be themselves, the mother and daughter are constantly comparing themselves to see which one is thinner, smarter, prettier or more successful in life. This is usually done in a fun-loving way, and the bond they share is understanding and strong.  However, it can lead to a feeling of not being seen, valued and accepted as they are – and unconditionally.

4. The Role-Reversal Relationship: This is where the mother expects her daughter to be there to support and bolster her. She has no concern for her daughter’s needs as her focus is ensuring her daughter nurtures her. This is clearly unhealthy as the daughter feels abandoned, and grows up feeling neglected and used.  As a child, the daughter’s learned she must sacrifice herself and only think others, and their needs and preferences. This can lead to being a doormat, and to low self-esteem.

(via psych-facts)

❒Single ❒Taken ✔Burdened with glorious purpose

..tis no jest :3

(via t-hiddles-thegodofperfection-de)

10 qualities to look for in a good relationship match

onlinecounsellingcollege:

10. Empathy: An individual’s ability to empathize with you is crucial in a relationship. Empathy is an important relationship skill that both parties should develop. Empathy is the ability to view the world from your partner’s eyes. Being able to put yourself in your partner’s shoes is essential to building a long term relationship based on mutual understanding. Empathy means being a team, a “we” rather than an isolated “I”.

9. Acceptance: Your partner should be able to “get” you. They should know your tastes, your likes, your dislikes, your moods, your innate personality — they should know that “real” you, and love you for being exactly who you are. Acceptance is a key relationship skill. Both you and your partner should accept one another for exactly the people that you are, faults and all. Your partner should love you because of everything that comprises who you are. Don’t accept any less.

8. Chemistry: Physical chemistry is important. While it may not be the most important thing on this list, healthy relationships require attraction as a force. You and your partner ought to be attracted to one another, physically and emotionally, and that attraction should lead to a healthy level of chemistry that can be sustained over time.

7. Steadfastness: Your partner should be steadfast with you in promises and obligations. With you, your partner should be able to keep his or her word. Steadfastness leads to trust, which is absolutely essential in healthy, long-term relationships. If your partner isn’t steadfast with you, then you have little reason to grow trust with this person. Do not become intimately involved with someone who cannot keep their word.

6. Goals: It is important that you and your partner support each others’ goals in life. Relationships take constant work and require that you and your partner have a willingness to work together and grow together. Your partner should support and help you reach the goals you want in your life.

5. Generosity: Your partner should be generous with you, not in the financial sense, but in the emotional sense. Most importantly, your partner ought to be generous with time, when it comes to you. An essential aspect of relationships is the ability to “give”. If you notice that your partner takes and takes without giving, perhaps it’s time to find a new partner. Generosity is the essence of healthy relationships.

4. Priorities: Your partner and you do not need to have the exact same priorities in life, but it certainly helps if your priorities are aligned. If you want to move to India one day to teach yoga at a spiritual retreat and your partner wants to move to Los Angeles to jumpstart a career in the entertainment industry, your priorities are definitely not aligned. Sometimes, for a relationship to thrive, priorities can be adjusted or redefined, which is fine, but both parties should be equally flexible in this.

3. Trust: Trust is the single most important factor when it comes to when a relationship is a success or a failure. You must be able to trust your partner, and your partner must be able to trust you. And both of you should give the other person reason to trust. With trust, you have the ability to be vulnerable — an important factor in long-term, successful partnerships. If you can’t be vulnerable with your partner, it’s time to move on.

2. Communication: Good relationships have great communication structures. Bad relationships almost always have terrible communication between partners. You and your partner should speak the same language, emotionally speaking, in the sense that you should be able to communicate your desires successfully. Neither party should be timid about asserting themselves when appropriate, and neither party should feel shy about communicating feelings at any point.

1. Commitment: Commitment is the most important quality to look for when deciding a successful match. If you are searching for love and a long-term relationship, you and your partner must be able and willing to commit to one another, understanding all the sacrifices and adjustments that are necessary when transitioning from single life to life as a couple.

Source: http://blog.zoosk.com/2009/09/24/10-qualities-to-look-for-in-a-successful-match/

…Seems legitimate :)

(via psych-facts)

The sad moment when you realize how alone you actually are. That no one ever messages you first or texts you first or anything. So it gets to the point where you don’t want to put in the effort with people who don’t put in any effort for you so you end up spending your life at home, never going anywhere.

yeah… srys gpoy :|

(Source: keep-me-from-waking, via tomhiddles)